Supposedly Warren Buffet once said: "Never ask your barber if you need a haircut." You can apply this advice to surgeons, dentists, and auto mechanics, too: all professionals tend to see their work as necessary, whether we agree or not.
Considering this, I asked myself this question:
"If you came to me and asked me if I thought you "needed" therapy, what would I say?"
Let's start with the word "need." There are three categories: Desperate Need, Pressing Need, and Maintenance.
First, Desperate Need. If you were in this category, you'd have a diagnosable mental disorder causing great suffering to you or to the people you love. Less than twenty percent of the people I work with fall into this category.
Pressing Need. People who have no diagnosable mental illness (but life is throwing them some curves) fall into this category. Maybe your relationship has soured, you're unhappy at work, or you've lost a loved one. Talking to an objective, trained person can help you find new ways of looking at your situation and open up new pathways. This category represents the bulk of my practice.
Finally, Maintenance. This category is for those who have no current problem but who are determined to live life in top mental/emotional shape. It is analogous to good car care. If you want to keep your vehicle running smoothly and extend its years of road worthiness, you rotate the tires and change the oil regularly.
Maintenance:
In my absolute favorite movie, Moonstruck, Vincent Gardenia plays Cher's father and a successful plumber. In talking to a yuppie couple about the repairs needed in their bathroom, he says:
"There are three kinds of pipe. There's the kind you've got, which is garbage...and you can see where that's gotten you.
Then there's bronze, which is very good...until something goes wrong...and something always goes wrong.
And then there's copper, which is the only pipe I use. It costs money...it costs money, because it saves money!"
First, Desperate Need. If you were in this category, you'd have a diagnosable mental disorder causing great suffering to you or to the people you love. Less than twenty percent of the people I work with fall into this category.
Pressing Need. People who have no diagnosable mental illness (but life is throwing them some curves) fall into this category. Maybe your relationship has soured, you're unhappy at work, or you've lost a loved one. Talking to an objective, trained person can help you find new ways of looking at your situation and open up new pathways. This category represents the bulk of my practice.
Finally, Maintenance. This category is for those who have no current problem but who are determined to live life in top mental/emotional shape. It is analogous to good car care. If you want to keep your vehicle running smoothly and extend its years of road worthiness, you rotate the tires and change the oil regularly.
Maintenance:
- gives you the chance to routinely reflect on your own life.
- provides you with the opportunity to see and try new approaches to life.
- strengthens your ability to know and say what's on your mind.
- enables you to identify and change aspects of yourself that have been holding you back.
- helps you to anticipate trouble ahead, and deal with it more effectively.
In my absolute favorite movie, Moonstruck, Vincent Gardenia plays Cher's father and a successful plumber. In talking to a yuppie couple about the repairs needed in their bathroom, he says:
"There are three kinds of pipe. There's the kind you've got, which is garbage...and you can see where that's gotten you.
Then there's bronze, which is very good...until something goes wrong...and something always goes wrong.
And then there's copper, which is the only pipe I use. It costs money...it costs money, because it saves money!"
So, if you asked me if you need therapy, I would say "yes." And furthermore I'd suggest you go for the copper pipes.
Copyright 2008 starfishdoc
PS If you would like more information about Maintenance for yourself, contact me at the email address listed in my profile.
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