Really Big Birthdays

I just had one of those Really Big Birthdays. You know, the kind that ends in a Zero. (Sorry, you'll have to do the math.)

I kept it pretty much a secret, because as an introvert, the last thing I wanted was a party. And a surprise party would be the worst.

No, what I wanted was a quiet time doing my favorite things with close friends. And I got what I asked for.

My two best friends drove five hours to spend the weekend with us. We spent most of our time settin' on the front porch solving the world's problems as well as our own. One of the things that makes us best friends is we don't mind listening to stories over again that we've told each other before. (Is that helping you with the math?)

We also had a wonderful dinner at a local bistro where we know the owners by name and they treat us like family. We toasted the occasion many, many times!

And the weekend was not without its excitement. After dinner we had to do catch and release on a bat that was performing acrobatics in our living room.

So what's this post really about? Two things. Really Big Birthdays and Introversion. And how the two go together.

When I was about eight months pregnant with my second child, I told my family that I absolutely did not want a baby shower. Despite their attempts to heed my request, one friend insisted. Worst of all, it was a surprise shower.

Introverts hate surprises. Introverts hate being in the limelight. I mean, really hate it, as in rather spend the day cleaning toilets.

Imagine my misery walking into a room full of people shouting "surprise!" and focusing all their attention on me! And I was in fact not surprised.

That's another thing about introverts. We are keen observers who rarely miss the subtle cues around us, such as someone talking a little too softly on the phone. So, I was not only miserable about going to the party, but now I felt the obligation to act surprised so my friend wouldn't be disappointed.

So, thanks to those who honored my desire for a quiet birthday, especially those who wanted to throw me a party but knew better. What finer gift than to be accepted and understood? What could feel more like love?

Moral of the story: if you want to help someone celebrate a special occasion, stop and walk around in their loafers. Especially if they are introverts. Help them celebrate in the way they would most desire it, not the way you think it should be done. They'll really be grateful.

Copyright 2007 starfishdoc