Life is Too Short for Beige

Like many of you, I spend way too much time in my office. In my case, it's my home office, where I write this blog (still haven't figured out how to write from the kayak), prepare classes, and work with clients online and by phone.

I recently decided to decorate it. (What I'm doing doesn't qualify as redecorating, because when we moved in, I rushed to get my phone and computer up and running and get the office functioning as quickly as possible. No time for finer touches.

As with many great things, this project was born of necessity. My desk chair, having served me well for over fifteen years, had become an ergonomic nightmare. So on a recent trip to Ikea, I found myself a new one. With encouragement from my friend Jeanne, a talented graphic designer, I chose the red-orange chair over the dark blue.

That set off a chain of events. Before I left Ikea, I had a matching leather waste basket and some red stain to finish the frames around two new prints. I also decided to paint some of the trim in the office green. (A log home needs some diversionary color or the knots in the pine walls start to move.)


This is a long intro to what happened yesterday, which was that I decided to finish the job by making some cushions and pillows. Here's a picture of what I had completed by the end of the day.

In the past, I have stressed the importance of light to a person's sense of well-being, but I haven't directly mentioned color. If you've seen my quilts, however, you can deduce that pretty easily. I believe color is on a par with light for influencing and directing perspective, attitude, and mood.

Despite what some color theorists would say, I think each person reacts in a unique way to a particular color. Response to a color is not uniform. So it is important to study how each color affects you and use them accordingly. For example, red gives me a feeling of power and competence.

The impact of color on a person's mood cannot be underestimated nor overstated. I have friends who just love neutrals, and friends who love pastels, and I'm always struck by the sense of calm that goes with their color choices. But I also sense that people who are shy about color are also shy about living.

Having color around you stimulates your creativity, enhances your mood, gives you courage, changes your outlook. Dorothy didn't have ruby slippers for nothing.

So, if you're feeling depressed or merely wish to evoke a certain mood, try some color therapy. Unlike retail therapy, it doesn't have to be costly. A little paint or fabric will do. But forget the beige! Mood change calls for bright color. Try some red. Try some green.

Better still, make it vermilion and olive.


Copyright starfishdoc 2008

Part II: The Gold in the Shadow

As I said in my first piece about shadow, there's gold in there. It is precisely because of that gold that we must go mining in the caves of shadow. But let me explain how shadow develops in the first place.

At birth, each of us possesses a full range of human qualities. These qualities start out neutral. But as we grow, influential people in our lives (like parents, teachers, and peers) point out qualities they dislike, and label them "bad." In a desire to be loved and accepted we react. We take those "bad" qualities, and one by one, excise them from our personalities.

What do we do with those cut off parts of self? As Robert Bly says, we throw them into a "long bag." With unsightly aspects of ourselves safely tucked away, we go on, seemingly scrubbed clean of our bad traits. Problem is, we continue to lug that long shadow bag and all its contents around with us. The trash man never comes to cart it off to the dump.

Furthermore, each time we throw something into the bag, really good stuff goes too. Examples. You are four years old. Your mom is at the kitchen table having coffee with her friends. You keep interrupting. Later she punishes you for being rude. Out comes your shadow bag, and you toss in rudeness. Along with it goes some spontaneity.

You're in the fifth grade and your teacher scolds you for clowning around. You get angry and get sent to the principal's office. You open the bag, toss in anger, and along with it, some passion and humor.

To sum it up, by the time we hit age twenty, we've gone from being a full circle of possibilities to being just a sliver of our potential selves. We've dumbed ourselves down. We've learned to color within the lines of life.

As adults we have two choices. One is to deny that we've thrown anything into the bag (even deny the existence of the bag itself). Or we can go into the bag and retrieve the gold we've thrown away.

Most of us are afraid to stick our hand in that bag. We don't know what might bite us. It is truly an act of courage to do so. But the alternative is leaving great chunks of ourselves languishing in the dark. Even worse: what we deny about ourselves we inflict on others. (More on that next time.)

Meanwhile, consider what parts of you you might have thrown away, thinking they were bad. And rejoice. There's great beauty in the shadow.


copyright 2007 starfishdoc
(Thanks, JMR for the first photo.)